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avatar CodRevolutionary5029 1 mon.ago

On a quest to find the Tommy Wiseau's The Room of dad jokes. Gimme your absolute best

Lost my job at the bank. Girlfriend is gonna be pissed. I don't know how to tell her.

dadjoke

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Looking for a natural mood booster? Science agrees: laughter truly is medicine for the soul! Whether you need a quick pick-me-up, an icebreaker for awkward moments, or just want to spread joy, corny jokes are your secret weapon.

In this curated list, we’ve compiled the best dad-approved one-liners, groan-worthy puns, and cheeky quips guaranteed to deliver belly laughs. Share these crowd-pleasing jokes at work, family dinners, or parties—no prescription needed!

funny dad jokes

funny dad jokes
1. A really huge muscular guy with a bad stutter walks up to a counter in a department store and asks, "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?"

The clerk behind the counter just looks at him and says nothing. The man repeats himself: "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?" Again, the clerk doesn't answer him. The guy asks several more times: "W-w-w-where's the m-m-m-men's dep-p-p-partment?" And the clerk just seems to ignore him. Finally, the guy storms away in anger after not being answered. The customer who was waiting in line behind the muscular guy asks the clerk, "Why wouldn't you answer that guy's question?" The clerk replies, "D-d-d-do you th-th-th-think I w-w-w-want to get b-b-b-beat up?!!"

2. How do you wish good luck to someone on their way to fertility treatments?

Make a leg!

3. Why are libraries commonly associated with paralysis?

Because of all the broken spines inside

4. What member of royalty is waiting for his chance on the porcelain throne?

Prince Charmin

5. You should be worried if cows are smoking marijuana.

That's when the steaks are highest...

6. My son asked me what "gay" means

I said "it means happy" He replied "Dad are you gay?" I laughed and said "No son, I have a wife"

7. What do you call it when an animal is invisible in the desert?

Camelflage

8. When we’re on vacation, I’ll stop at random hotel doors and say stuff like, “You’re strong. You’re solid. And most importantly, you give every guest the perfect preview of who’s knocking.” My wife’s like, “Ugh! Why the hell do you always do this??”

I remind her, “Babe…you know I’m a peephole pleaser.”

9. What did Dr Frankenstein say when his computer connected?

It's online. Online!

10. You would never be able to make Blazing Saddles today.

If you did, you’d get sued for copyright infringement.

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